Fear vs Love
by JadedLights07
Summary: Hogwarts may be a school of magic - but when it's filled with reckless girls and stupid boys ... accidents are bound to happen right? Marlene knows this all too well - and Sirius is about to discover just how drastic these accidents can be. (Warning: swearing) DRABBLES
1. Fear Vs Love

**Disclaimer: I'm not J.K. Rowling, and I don't own anything you read. Also while I'm disclaiming stuff, the cover photo isn't actually mine either *gasp***

_"Sirius I'm pregnant"_

_There was a long pause as Marlene waited with bated breath. Her hands were shaking and she could feel her eyes sting. Glancing up, she saw Sirius staring down at her with his face frozen in his previous expression - full of laughter and mischief. But then his wide smile began to look forced until finally it was wiped off completely._

_"What?" He whispered, leaning on the wall behind him. And right then, Marlene saw a certain emotion flash across his eyes; one she had never seen before in the grey orbs: fear. It burned brightly as they flickered between both of her own blue ones, searching for any possible misunderstandings - anything that might suggest that the words she had uttered were not real. _

_But it _was_ real. Marlene had known for a while now. She hadn't been sure whether to tell him or not, but as days turned into weeks, she knew she wouldn't be able to keep it hidden for long. Marlene didn't answer Sirius. The helplessness and desperation in her eyes was enough confirmation for him. _

Sirius had been revisiting that night over and over again for the past two days, since it had happened. He'd remembered her voice; it had only spoken those three words, yet it had seemed to be a cry of plea. He also remembered his reaction. Sirius had stopped thinking when he'd heard those words. His eyes had glazed over and he'd roared as loud as he could, nails digging into his thighs. They were lucky that the room of requirement was sound proof, or he'd been sure that the whole school would have heard. In his fit of rage, Sirius ricked over chairs, punched walls in and turned tables over. He'd spent ten whole minutes just cursing at the top of his voice, completely oblivious to Marlene's almost unfazed facial expression. In fact the only sign she showed in response to Sirius' violent outburst was the steady stream of tears.

After storming out of the room, Sirius had proceeded to avoid Marlene as much as possible, feeling worse every minute. It got to the point where his guilt and self-disgust had risen so much, it had completely over ridden the underlying fear of commitment.

The Marauders had long gone up to bed, leaving Sirius standing up against a wall in the shadows, staring into the cracks of the walls. He wasn't thinking of anything – not really. For once Sirius was trying to figure out what the right thing to do was – what he believed the right thing was. Sirius knew fully well he was being a complete jackass, but until recently, the paralysing feeling he'd get at the thought of a wife-and-child future was enough to override it.

He heard a soft pair of footsteps come downstairs from the girl's dormitories – Sirius didn't have to turn around to know that it was Marlene. She must have had a nightmare and the thought filled him with anger – knowing he had most likely played a large role in it. The footsteps paused as Marlene took in his presence, and slowly inched toward his corner of the room. She sank into one of the nearby armchairs without a word. They stayed silent for a long while, both lost in their own thoughts – until Sirius cautiously decided to break it.

"How - how long … do you know when …" His brain had constantly been going into overdrive lately, and whenever he'd tried to focus on a thought, he'd just blank out. He sat down on the edge of an armchair opposite to Marlene's. He shut his eyes tightly, but it just caused his head to start throbbing. Him – a father? Sirius Black – disowned and notoriously reckless … The prospect had never occurred to him, but now it was staring right at his face with a wand at his throat. Placing his head in his hands, Sirius took a deep breath. After what felt like an eternity, he heard Marlene's voice.

"5 weeks. I'm due in May" Her voice was quiet but she might have shouted, the way Sirius' head snapped up. He nodded slowly.

"Okay" He whispered - almost to himself. "Okay" He repeated, louder with slight determination laced in his voice.

"What am I going to do Sirius? I'm barely 18, we're graduating in three months … and then what? I can't be a … a mother!" Marlene's voice began to grow high pitched and the tears she seem to always be holding in came cascading down her face.

Automatically, Sirius clasped her hands in both of his and scooted forward off his seat and on his knees as she sat in her armchair. It was 2 in the morning in the Gryffindor Common room and the fire blazing across the empty room was the only source of light. Marlene's tears shimmered, reflecting the dancing flames, and Sirius gently wiped them off.

"Lena, I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know how safe any of us will be outside of these walls. And you can bet all your gold that I certainly don't know how to look after a child. I do know though, that I'm so sorry, and that I'm sticking with you – if you'll have me. I won't let you take this on alone. I'm scared Lena. I'm so fucking scared. But I know it's nothing to what you're going through … so let me be there for you, okay? Oh and for the record, you're going to be an amazing mother"

With a muffled wail, Marlene fell out of her armchair into his arms. She buried her head in his neck and cried. They lay on the floor of the common room together; Marlene's heart wrenching sobs and Sirius' silent tears as he rubbed her back.

They fell into an uncomfortable slumber, both with puffy eyes and dry throats. The morning would arrive soon, and they would be expected to act as if nothing had changed - as if their world hadn't completely turned 180. They both knew that they weren't supposed to work. They should have been in that physical relationship, with no complications - but before it had even started, Marlene and Sirius were in too deep.

Or maybe, they _were_ meant to be together. After all, there were little things that made them click. Like how Sirius never once asked Marlene whether the baby was really his … or even if she was going to keep it. Or the way Marlene had left an option open for Sirius to back out if he wanted to - because even though Sirius Black was known for keeping true to his words, one of his biggest fears was being tied down, and Marlene wasn't about to force him into anything.

It was the little things about Sirius and Marlene that made them work, because when they did finally wake up the next morning to various catcalling, Marlene flipped the bird up at the lot of them while Sirius simply refused to take his eyes off of her.


	2. Will you still love me?

The sun shone blazingly – it was after all the middle of summer in Britain. The brightness had arrived far too early for Marlene's liking. It woke her up, and the glare refused to be blocked out. With an irritated sigh, she climbed out of bed, eyes still aching from staying up all night finishing off the defence essay. Checking the vintage clock on her bedside table, Marlene internally groaned. Six thirty. _Great_. Breakfast wasn't till another hour, and she was never one for spending much time on her appearance in the mornings. Usually she'd wake up with 10 minutes to spare – and even that would be plenty.

As if a daily routine, Marlene walked to her mirror behind the wardrobe door. She was lucky that when it was opened, it blocked her from her dorm mates' view. She stared at her reflection for a few seconds with a crease forming between her eyebrows. Ducking around her door to make sure Lily-the-morning-bird wasn't awake yet, Marlene whipped back to her reflection and slowly lifted her oversized t-shirt above her stomach. She analysed herself for a moment, turning around to her sides every now and then. She didn't seem to look any different from yesterday, and it calmed her down marginally – enough for her to go on with her day with a somewhat strained smile. Marlene wasn't sure what she was expecting, if it was a sudden bulge that grew overnight or even just a little extra fat – anything that would slap her into reality. Being pregnant was still feeling very surreal to her. She hadn't had any symptoms, no one had noticed anything different about her (other than maybe a little paler) and the only thing going for the baby were the 53 sticks with positive pluses.

Nodding her head and absentmindedly massaging her abdomen, Marlene decided to go have a shower. Normally she preferred the night baths – all the other girls had their showers in the mornings which allowed her to spend as much time as she wanted in the midst of soothing bath salts. Recently, Marlene had been spending hours in the water which offered her relaxation like nothing else. The stress of the future was mounting heavily and even though she had Sirius to talk to, he couldn't guarantee that everything would turn out okay.

Stepping out of the shower, Marlene wrapped a bathrobe securely around her and brushed her teeth. For some unexplainable reason, Marlene had been fascinated with mirrors. Four weeks ago, days would go by where she wouldn't even glance at a mirror even once and now she found herself brushing a little slower, just to be able to look at her face longer. There was nothing vain in the action – Marlene knew that. She was looking for something else – a sign she supposed, or maybe something that would reveal her secret. Perhaps that was what she was most worried about, Marlene reasoned – people finding out.

She didn't have much time to dwell on the subject though, because Lily soon started knocking loudly. Lily was a creature of habit – and evidently, Marlene was eating up her shower time. Smiling at her friend fondly, Marlene rinsed her mouth and walked out the door with a "My apologies, your majesty" at a bemused Lily. Pulling on her uniform and dabbing some light lavender scented perfume, Marlene glanced back at the clock. She still had half an hour. Deciding to put some effort into her appearance for a change, she French plaited her long blonde hair around the crown of her head, pulling strands in and out, leaving an intricate braid that framed her face nicely. She even pulled out the age old mascara and applied two light coats. Inspecting her self-makeover, Marlene pulled out her favourite coral coloured lipstick and carefully traced her full lips. With a satisfied nod, she walked out the dorm with a new spring in her step. She had almost forgotten the confidence getting dressed up felt like. She hadn't put this much effort on a school morning since fifth year, when she'd wanted to impress Amos Diggory. Snorting at her foolish past self, Marlene made her way down the stairs, arriving at the relatively full common room. She found her friends, Lily, Dorcas and Alice waiting for her.

Upon seeing her walking towards them, Dorcas wolf whistled loudly and winked, causing the others to turn to her as well.

"Marlene, you look great!" Exclaimed Lily, beaming widely. "What's the occasion?"

"Just feeling good, is all," Marlene smiled. She knew that they had only made such a fuss because they had noticed her recent lack of zest. As if her eyes were on autopilot, Marlene's eyes glanced around the room.

"Sirius already went down with the other Marauders," Alice supplied with a small smirk. Marlene nudged her arm playfully before linking them with hers and walking out the portrait hole, closely followed by Dorcas and Lily who were animatedly discussing James Potter's behind.

As they climbed down staircases and walked along hallways, Marlene noticed a number of appreciative smiles from the male student body directed at her. She smiled back amusedly. Who knew dressing up a little would bring so much attention? For a second she wondered if Sirius would notice, but shook herself out of the daydream. As much as Sirius loved her (she was pretty sure of this, even though they hadn't actually said the words out yet), he was never one for following the dating rules – and noticing new hair dos was number one.

Walking into the Great Hall, she found that it was about half filled, mostly with eager Ravenclaws who were generally the first to rise. She didn't bother to be subtle this time and instead craned her head around bustling individuals, trying to find her boyfriend. It was still weird calling him that – even in her own mind – but the father of her child wasn't the safest alternative.

She saw the brunette Hufflepuff sixth year first though. She was leaning towards Sirius with a sultry smile, not bothering to be delicate about displaying her cleavage. Sirius wasn't facing Marlene, his back was – so the only way he'd see her there was if he turned around. The girl was laughing about something loudly before looking up and meeting Marlene's glare. Taking it as a challenge, the girl leaned even closer, whispering something in Sirius's ear. Marlene saw Sirius turn his head towards the brunette before standing up abruptly, causing his chair to fall back with a small crash. At the sound, people seated and standing around the two turned to look at them curiously. The Hufflepuff's smile faltered, and she tried to maintain her composure.

Marlene stumbled clumsily forward, thanks to Alice, the force allowing her locomotion. They saw Sirius bite out something under his breath that they couldn't quite catch. The brunette however, did.

"What?" She said snootily, her voice an annoying high soprano "It's pretty obvious." The girl now turned towards Marlene with the sneer back in place. "Honey, you really should hold back on those Sugar Quills – I've heard Black here doesn't go for fat birds," she said much louder than was necessary.

Marlene's throat went dry, and Sirius whipped around to find her shocked and hurt face.

"Johnson, Lena will always be ten times the woman you could ever hope to be. Stay the fuck away from me _and _her or I swear to god I'll make you regret it." Sirius snarled – shocking everybody surrounding them. The Hufflepuff, Johnson, stalked away with an ugly expression on her caked up face. Sirius's fist was clenched tightly and he slowly picked up his chair and sat back down. Marlene tried to contort her expression into a neutral if not amused smile and took her seat next to Sirius.

She looked up at her friends to find them all glancing confusedly at each other. It was a common occurrence for Marlene to be targeted by jealous and hateful girls. She was always considered very pretty – with the golden locks and royal blue eyes that seemed to sparkle endlessly. Her long legs were the envy of many girls and the objects of desire for even more boys, - not to mention Sirius in particular was always very vocal in his appreciation of Marlene's traits. The pair would often flirt very publicly and crudely in front of their friends for kicks, but ever since people noticed them getting serious – well it was certainly not the first time Marlene was called fat.

It was however, the first time anyone responded so ferociously. Normally Marlene would laugh it off, easily quipping a nifty comeback that would drive them away. Her friends, especially Lily looked at her in concern. Marlene smiled and rolled her eyes, trying to brush off their questioning eyes, but the way Sirius was tearing his pancakes into many small pieces wasn't helping her efforts.

She placed her hand on his leg comfortingly under the table and it seemed to have the desired calming effect. He brought his left hand down and squeezed hers. Marlene kept her eyes downcast on her plate, trying to not let Johnson's words affect her.

"Marly-boo bear, don't you want any breakfast?" Dorcas asked with a sing-song voice, trying to clear the tension in the air. Remus raised his eyebrows at her while Lily kicked her hard. James continued to look questioningly at Sirius who shrugged noncommittally and began shovelling his food down.

"'Course Dorky-dolly," Marlene replied in the same tone with a large smile. Her chirpy response successfully diverted any attention on her, and they continued with their own conversations. Relieved, she dropped the smile and began to reach for the waffles – her favourite. Midway between the large dish though, Johnson's voice rang loud and clear through her head _"I've heard Black here doesn't go for fat birds,"._ It was petty but she suddenly stopped reaching for the carb and calorie filled plate and instead diverted her arm to the one filled with eggs. She knew that gaining a whole lot of weight would be unavoidable, but Marlene wanted to delay it as much as possible – at least to after Graduation. Sirius had been her backbone in the past weeks and she didn't know how she could take on the school's judging looks and pity smiles if anybody found out. His presence made it that much easier for her to smile and joke and anything else she used to do.

She didn't really believe that he would desert her once she started gaining the weight, but a particularly irrational part of her was winning the battle today – and had been for the past fortnight, actually.

Eggs weren't her favourite – she would only eat it before games for strength, but today its stench was on the borderline of revolting. Scrunching up her nose slightly, Marlene spooned scrambled eggs onto her plate. She decided that if she ate it quick enough, she'd probably be able to taste it less, and so began eating in large portions. Somewhere after the third spoonful though, she decided that she actually liked scrambled eggs after all.

"Does anybody know the correct wand movements for the Patronus Charm?" Lily asked the group.

"An anticlockwise wave, finishing with an upward flick. It is also not uncommon for left handers to clockwise, though." Remus smiled. Lily beamed, and quickly noted the new piece of information.

"When's this due again?" Peter asked with disinterest.

"After Lunch," Alice promptly replied, going back to spreading butter on her third slice of toast.

Peter spit out his pumpkin juice, spraying it all over the table. Unfortunately, he was sitting diagonally to Marlene, and a few drops landed in her plate.

As the others either grimaced in disgust or tried to console Peter on his forgetfulness, Marlene swirled her eggs around her plate. They suddenly didn't look so appealing anymore. In fact – the yellow colour of the eggs reminded her of Doxy droppings, and she pushed the half eaten plate away, closing her eyes.

"You're looking a little pale there Marls," Alice voiced quietly from beside her, but Marlene just furrowed her brows. Sirius, who was discussing the new beater for the Chudley Canons with James, flicked his eyes towards her. He noticed her breathing was louder and she was shaking slightly.

"Lena?" He asked slowly. "Is everything okay?"

Marlene tried to nod weakly, but when she felt her stomach dangerously gurgling, she bolted out of the hall. She heard her friends call her name out loudly, but payed them no attention, pushing past the annoyed Slytherin fourth years. Luckily, the closest loo was only on the next corridor, and she reached the first cubicle in the nick of time. Spewing her entire breakfast was not pretty. The sight of vomit further catalysed another round of belches, until there was nothing left. Flushing the toilet with a grimace, Marlene shut the toilet and sat on the seat, head in her hands.

As she was trying to get her vision to stop spinning, Marlene heard footsteps run into the bathroom. They were heavy footsteps, and the owner was breathing loudly.

"Lena?" Asked a surprisingly gentle voice. Sirius was the only person who called her by the name – also the only person she knew who had such a deep and loud voice but was still able to use it so softly. Marlene got up and unlocked the door, wiping her mouth and performing a quick cleaning and refreshing spell.

"I'm fine, don't worry. I knew I shouldn't have eaten so much," Marlene went to the sink, where Sirius was standing with an anxious frown.

"Are you sure? Nothing's wrong is it? Do you want to go to the hospital wing?" He asked.

"What, and get told that I'm pregnant? I'd rather the matron not find out. It's fine Sirius, but I think I'll skip morning classes." She smiled at his concern. It was odd seeing Sirius worried. He walked over to Marlene, and lifted her chin, inspecting her face for any signs of illness. He placed the back of his hand on the base of her throat, looking for extra heat. The smoothness of his skin against her neck caused a little shiver to run through her – even after all this time she wasn't used to his touch.

Sirius smirked, satisfied with his inspection. He snaked his arm around her and pulled her close, skimming the tip of his nose along her forehead. His rustic scent of cigarette and expensive cologne soothed her quicker than any pepperup potion could.

"Sirius … " Marlene began slowly – still not sure whether she should bring it up. She did know though, that if she couldn't get this cleared up, it would continue to eat her up.

"Mmm," Sirius hummed, his right hand tracing her collarbone while his other was still securely around her waist. Marlene hesitated for a minute, biting her lip. Sirius stopped his carefree observations of her, and instead tried looking into her eyes, which were determinedly eyeing her hands.

"Yes, Lena?" He asked a little louder.

"Do you think I've become fatter?" Marlene asked in the quietest possible voice she could muster. Sirius raised his eyebrows disbelievingly before looking angry. He brought both hands to her face now, and crouched slightly so they were on the same eye level.

"Marlene," He spoke quietly. The use of her full name surprised her, and she looked up quickly. "Bethany Johnson is a lying jealous cow. Don't listen to anything she says – I'm not going to leave you. Not now, not in five months, not ever. Okay?" Sirius said loudly and almost desperately.

"She's hurt you, I knew it. That scheming bitch better be ready for complete and utter humiliation. No one is allowed to upset people I care about and get away with it." He hissed, venom laced in his voice.

Marlene nodded but she didn't look appeased. "You didn't answer my question,"

Sirius paused for a moment. "No," He stated. "But if you ask me again next month I'll probably say yes, and you know what, I couldn't care less. You do realise that you're carrying my fucking child right? That means a lot to me, Lena. The only thing a few extra pounds can do is make you even sexier, which shouldn't be humanely possible." Sirius smirked, sliding a hand up her shirt and tracing patterns on the skin of her stomach sending tingles to the pits of her soul. He leaned down and kissed her enthusiastically to emphasise his point. Marlene smiled widely into his mouth, responding with just as much energy.

"I'm going to get so fucking fat, Black" Marlene pointed out teasingly. Sirius chuckled and backed her up against the wall, kissing down her neck.

"If that means I can start looking forward to midnight expeditions of chocolate frog hunts, then bring it on babe,"

Marlene pushed him away playfully. "Hey!" She laughed. "I'm the one who has to eat for two, not you. Therefore, I claim rights to all things sweet!" Sirius barked out a laugh and started tickling Marlene, going straight for the back of her neck where she was most sensitive. She shrieked out and tried wiggling away, but he trapped her between his legs, held both of her hands above her head and blew in her ear causing another shriek of laughter. Sirius decided he rather liked that sound as he let her loose and leaned on one side, crossing is arms with the ever present smirk.

"Aren't you late for class? Poor old Sluggy will miss his biggest trouble maker," Marlene grinned.

"Well if you aren't going to endure double potions, I don't see why I have to either. Want me to make you feel better?" Sirius asked with a gleam in his eyes. They both knew she wasn't anywhere near being sick – but their friends didn't need to know. Marlene snickered.

"Steady on. You'd better keep those hormones in check after bub arrives."

"All the more reason then, to get it on now while we still have all the freedom to." He winked saucily before picking her up via piggy back and sprinting into a hidden room that no one but the Marauders knew about. This one was behind a portrait of Queen Guinevere and King Arthur and it wasn't anywhere near as grand as the room of requirement, but it was filled with cushions and even had a large window overlooking the forbidden forest. It had soon become her and Sirius' 'spot' and they would spend much of their time in there – whether it was the occasional sex or special dates (which would often end up with the two naked and tangled in each other's limbs anyway).

He dropped her unceremoniously, and Marlene landed on a large pile of cushions – wriggling to get comfortable. She giggled softly as Sirius eagerly climbed up on top of her and kissed wherever he could find exposed skin.

Marlene looked into Sirius darkened eyes as he lay beneath her. The way he'd scream _Marlene_ and his constant teasing was like ecstasy to her. She couldn't get enough of him – not just the way he'd make her feel like a million galleons without even saying anything, but also how _good_ of a man he was.

Growing up in a horrific family and not letting them corrupt his mind.

Protecting his friends with such ferocity that he often end up in detention of in the hospital wings.

Standing by Marlene with such promise even when he knew how much his life would change – for choosing a pregnant girl over a thousand nights of partying and getting drunk. For any other man, perhaps it was expected – but for Sirius it was literally sacrificing everything he once strongly believed in, and Marlene loved him to no end for it.


	3. Tomorrow I might be fine

"The goblin rebellion seemed to have paused during the 13th century. Many thought that this was the work of Cadwold the Cruel. His strong views and rather harsh punishments certainly frightened the …" Professor Bins continued to drone – the majority of the class had now fallen into deep stupor – even Lily had glazed eyes.

The annoying thing though, was that none of these students were daft enough to actually pick History of Magic as a NEWT subject. This had in fact been the Defence class; however their teacher, Professor Gibbons had fallen critically ill, and had left the post, leaving old Binns to take over for the time being. Professor Binns, of course knew nothing about Defence against the Dark Arts, and had elected to simply teach them History.

On a Monday morning, it was probably the worst class to start the week off with – it just left the group feeling drowsy for the remaining day – and lack of performance always meant huge piles of homework. It was an annoying cycle, so they'd decided to just sleep through the lesson.

On top of it all, Marlene had been feeling sick lately, but had been avoiding the hospital wing like ironically, the plague. She was sitting in the front row of the dusty classroom – a decision she was very much regretting. On her right sat Dorcas Meadows, a short, but powerful athlete. Unfortunately, due to her chronic fear of heights, she'd never tried out for the Quidditch team. As she was lazily cutting split ends off of her chestnut brown hair, she glanced up at Marlene, mouthing 'Wanna get drunk tonight?'. Marlene grinned with enthusiasm, about to agree – before remembering that alcohol and unborn babies did not go well together. So instead, Marlene shook her head, rolled her eyes and mouthed back 'Are you crazy? It's a Monday!' Doe just stuck her tongue out with a 'Party pooper' and went back to trimming her locks.

Marlene sighed with disappointment. Sooner or later, a party was going to be held – especially with Graduation so near and she didn't know how she'd be able to avoid such events. Marlene didn't know very much about pregnancies or babies for that matter – though she lived in a family of seven children (four older brothers, one older sister and a younger brother). One would think Marlene knew about families and was used to the idea of children, but being born into wealthy pureblood household meant days of learning French, proper etiquette and ballroom dancing, while her younger sibling was to be taken care of by his nanny and older siblings were off at Hogwarts. Marlene had been guarded her entire life – with information being restricted to only what her parents and society deemed appropriate and experiences being limited to those she would secretly read about in forbidden novels. So when it came to being pregnant, she knew next to nothing. Common sense however, she had plenty – and this meant cutting out the drinking, smoking and the mushrooms. Naturally, this also meant a lot less time with Dorcas, and a lot more time with Lily.

Marlene had been focused on her studies, which wasn't a surprise, because luckily their oh-so-important NEWTs were only a month away, and the seventh years were left to spend late nights in the common room, flicking though pages of elemental transfiguration and healing potions.

Marlene slid down her rigid chair, trying to get comfortable – she would have to endure this for another half hour after all. Turning to her right, Marlene spotted Lily who had her long red-auburn hair – that had a habit of falling in her face to which she would blow away with a huff – down. She was doodling on her parchment with a small smile. Raising her eyebrows, Marlene inched closer and whispered "Five Galleons that you're drawing 'James Potter' in little hearts,"

Lily instantly flushed and snatched her parchment away, scrunching it up tightly. Marlene snickered loudly, causing Professor Binns to cut off his monologue and look up at Marlene annoyingly.

"Miss Michelson, is there a reason for you interruption?"

Marlene smiled sweetly and began to answer in her most angelic voice that she had in fact only been admiring her Professor's wit and cleverness – when the words died halfway through. A sudden jolt in her stomach caused her to lurch forward, grasp her mouth tightly and run out of the classroom. Making her way to the door was embarrassing – as she had to pass all the rows of curious and half-awake students. She saw Sirius who had his eyebrows furrowed, looking up at her, and Alice with her chubby face watching her in concern. Marlene pleaded with her eyes for neither to follow her and sprinted to the nearest bathroom.

Flushing down her fourth rejected breakfast in the fortnight was getting annoying. Not to mention, Marlene was now more than a little worried. She wasn't sure if this was normal for somebody pregnant, or if there was something seriously wrong going on. She'd been checking her temperature often, but all she ever found was a perfectly healthy result – which would have been a consolation but had just worried her even more. Perhaps this meant that it's even more serious than a bug travelling around? Marlene would have to talk to somebody about this soon, she thought. All the vomiting was scaring her and it was coming to the time when she needed to start making sacrifices for her baby.

As if it had become a routine, Marlene lazily washed out her mouth and transfigured some spare quills into a toothbrush and toothpaste and began refreshing. Now feeling very thirsty, Marlene walked back into the DADA classroom and awkwardly went to her seat, feeling the stares following her. She sat down quietly, and pulled out her water bottle from her bag, before gulping its contents down like it was her lifeline.

* * *

Sirius sat in the back row, his usual spot between James and Peter. He had been absentmindedly ripping his parchment into small shreds for the past twenty minutes, not paying any attention whatsoever to his ancient Professor. But when Marlene had raced out the classroom without so much as a warning, Sirius began to grow restless. He was sure that she wasn't sick – it was he who had insisted she repeatedly check her temperature – and also judging by the nights they spent more often than not together, she was definitely full of energy. So what then? Sirius speculated. For a brief moment, he wondered if it meant their baby was hurt in some way. His stomach twisted unpleasantly at the thought.

Sirius might have been wary and defensive of the idea of a Black heir at first, but as the weeks went by, he had accepted the situation and had even begun to grow excited. _Who wouldn't want to meet a person who had both Lena's and my genes? It's perfection right there. _He thought arrogantly. Sirius had joked many times in their past years about how if ever they were to procreate, their children would resemble the gods (from himself, of course) as well as have sharp tongues and short tempers (Lena's contribution, no doubt), and Marlene would proudly reply that fucking him was high on her bucket list, but if he ever got her knocked up, she'd make sure that she was the last person he'd have sex with. Marlene had meant it as a threat to castrate him, but when Sirius went back on the memories, he realised that she'd been perfectly right – the only person who he would ever want to sleep with again was Marlene (he certainly wasn't complaining either – no one out of his extensive list of sex partners had made him feel as high on pleasure as she had).

The entire class was awake by the time Marlene left the room. They were raising their eyebrows – people were curious as to why she kept getting sick. The last time this had happened, they were in McGonagall's lecture. Sirius had wondered if it was the breakfast that was upsetting her stomach, but no matter what she ate in the morning, it would be out within the hour – and then she'd be fine for the rest of the day. It was puzzling him to no end. Sirius wished that there were subjects the school offered that taught about health, or the human body – that way, he would be able to find a book (on the occasion that he actually steps foot into a library) to help them out. Their only option – Sirius realised – was asking somebody for help.

Looking around the room, Sirius noticed that people had begun to whisper, occasionally looking towards him. Sirius didn't have time to worry what that might have meant because evidently, James also noticed and he subtly leaned towards Sirius an inch to the right.

"Mate, is everything alright with Marley?" He muttered. Sirius bit his lip, wanting to tell his brother the truth. He wanted to tell James that he was shitting himself, so _so_ scared for the future. He wanted to tell him things he wasn't able to tell Lena – things that would simply add to her burden. Thinking about Marlene though, Sirius figured that if anybody else were to be told, she should have the final say. And on that thought, Sirius simply shrugged, going back to his defiled parchment.

Sirius didn't notice however, that James continued to frown, seeing through him completely. James glanced back up, finding Lily's eyes which were curiously observing Sirius. She pursed her lips before slowly turning back to face the front, and James just crossed his arms and returned to his original position, refusing to forget about it.

"So you finally did it then huh?" Asked a snide voice. Sirius looked up at a Ravenclaw prefect who had an extremely pointed face and mousy brown waves. He might have been considered good looking if it wasn't for the twisted expression he often wore. Some people were able to pull off domineering smirks – namely Sirius, James and Dorcas – while others really couldn't. "And let's face it, it was really inevitable. You can't fool people for any longer, Black" Sirius scowled at him darkly, eyes flashing. James – who was directly sitting behind the prefect – looked between the two.

"You don't know what you're talking about, Smith. Why don't you go back to your precious little books and clubs, and keep your nose out of things that don't concern you." Sirius snarled back. Smith's lips just curled up.

"_You_ may be completely unintelligent – but you seem to have forgotten that _my_ parentage means I do get the best of both worlds." And with that last whisper, he turned back around.

Sirius groaned internally. Of course, Darren Smith was a half-blood and surprisingly rather proud about it. His mother was a witch from the Bones family, and his father was a very rich muggle healer. A gynaecologist, he'd heard – whatever that meant. Evidently, Smith's father had lots of knowledge on the human body, and no doubt Darren had picked up books lying around – he'd expect no less from a Ravenclaw. If a nobody could tell that Marlene was pregnant, Sirius began to worry how many people would soon find out. There really wasn't much to be ashamed of – though even he knew that society wouldn't accept them. _Fuck them._ Sirius scoffed. The only thing stopping him from shouting to the world if they dare judge was Marlene's predicament. Not to mention her brothers. Sirius was a brave and reckless man, but even he knew not to cross them all – and surely knocking up their baby sister would guarantee him a death sentence. Sirius paled slightly at the thought and shook himself out of his musings.

"What the hell was Smith talking about?" James muttered suspiciously, narrowing his eyes at his best mate and brother. He looked as if anything but the truth would appease him now.

Resigning with a sigh, Sirius shook his and muttered "Later,"

James almost glared, as if to say 'You'd better,' and glanced at Marlene concernedly before facing to the professor once more.

Sirius sat back, silently fuming. Now that the shock of Smith figuring it out was fading away, what he'd actually said began to sink in. The way the Ravenclaw was so smug was making Sirius' blood boil and he began tapping his quill furiously against his desk, burning holes through Smith's head. To his irritation, Smith discretely leaned to a Gryffindor girl, Emmeline Vance and Hestia Jones, another Ravenclaw sitting beside her and began whispering. Sirius's attention sparked and he snapped his eyes at them, trying to pick up what was being said. He knew that the pompous brat was proud, so naturally he'd waste no time in telling everybody what he'd figured out. Sirius growled quietly when he saw Smith nod towards Marlene, and muttered something that elicited a gasp and laugh from Vance. His fears were confirmed.

Not thinking things through much, Sirius stood up and briskly walked around his table. He vaguely registered Professor Binns addressing him but paid no further attention. Instead Sirius pulled Darren Smith up by his collar – completely forgetting to use his wand – and punched him straight in the face so hard that he fell back, hit his head on a nearby desk and was knocked out. Vance screamed shrilly and bent down to check on Smith, but Sirius just picked his books up and stormed out of the classroom. The whole class had broken off from their day dreams and had gaped obviously at the pair – it happened so quick that none were able to stop him.

Heading straight to the common room, Sirius threw his books on his desk with such force that many bounced off onto the ground. Needing to let off steam, he paced the room and settled in front of an area of the wall that suddenly looked unappealing and punched through it. He yelled in frustration and kicked over more chairs before finally sinking to the floor, breathing heavily. Now that Emmeline and Hestia knew – having the biggest mouths in the school, and now having attained the juiciest gossip in a long time – everyone from old Snivellus to Professor Vector would know. He could already feel the stares; hear the whispering and giggling and girls taunting Marlene – calling her a dirty slag when the majority of them weren't virgins either.

Sirius shut his eyes tightly, trying to calm himself down. He could feel his nerves electrify and his heart pump as if he was lying on a drum, and his breathing was quickly becoming constricted. He was having a panic attack – and unless he controlled his breathing, the hyperventilation would eventually kill him. Staggering into the shower, Sirius turned the water onto full cold and ducked his head under. The freezing temperature was enough to shock him into normal breathing – and the longer he stayed the calmer he felt.

Sirius heard the clock chime in the distant and paled. Class was over and people would start interacting. Muttering a quick drying spell, Sirius ran down the stairs and towards the Defence room. He was sure that by now, the entire class would know – and judging by the Slytherin numbers in the class, Marlene would probably already be receiving sneers and laughter. Sirius sped up – if Marlene was going to be mocked, he was damn well going to curse them all. He knew Marlene was very well equipped to handle them by herself, but he was no coward – and he wasn't going to let people try and bully them.

Running through various hexes and curses, he turned into the corridor where people were already coming out of. He saw many people from his class look up at him in an amused manner, raising eyebrows and stopping conversations as he walked past. He had a half mind to begin hexing them, but chose instead to find Marlene. He saw a flash of red that he instantly recognised as Lily – and where one was, it was more than likely the other three were with her. Sure enough, when he got closer, now walking briskly through the bands of people – it was like going against the tide – he found Marlene with Dorcas, Lily, James, Remus and Alice. Peter was missing – perhaps too excited for his free hour, visiting the kitchens.

"Lena!" He called. He saw Marlene look up instantly – and to his anger, saw that her eyes were bloodshot. She wasn't crying though, but he could tell that she was just hanging on. Dorcas was tightly holding her hand, and James looked like a fish, opening his mouth and closing it – much to the annoyance of Lily, who was simultaneously trying to glare at observers and keep him from saying something insensitive. Remus and Alice were both speaking very loudly – perhaps trying to divert attention away from Marlene – but it didn't seem to be helping much. Sirius reached the group within seconds and instinctively reached out for Marlene's hand. He also noted that James was now looking at him rather dangerously. Sirius gulped. James might as well have been Marlene's older brother – his protectiveness was definite. It had even taken a while for him to be okay with her dating Sirius. Now though, it was all in the open, and James – the dutiful representative of Marlene's blood brothers seemed to be an inch away from giving him a right hook. It looked as though the only thing stopping him was Remus' firm grip on his shoulder. Sirius sent a grateful look at the more reserved Marauder before turning to Marlene.

"What did they say?"

Sirius saw Marlene grow cold and her mouth set into an unpleasant scowl.

"Everybody has heard about it, obviously – and thanks to your little outburst, they know it's true." She sent him a glare, but didn't take her hand out of his. Sirius rolled his eyes.

"People would have believed it even if I hadn't punched the ass hat," he scoffed "You know how gullible people here are."

"That doesn't mean you have to confirm it!" Dorcas snarled. Sirius' previous half-hearted annoyance became full blown as he faced a fuming Dorcas. Their personalities were so similar that it wasn't uncommon for them to be clashing and fighting when they weren't on the same side.

"Stay out of it, Meadows. This isn't my fault."

Dorcas scoffed. "Isn't it though? Marley wouldn't be in this position if you'd have kept your dick in your pants." She said quietly with venom. Sirius growled and inched forwards into her face, eyes flashing with anger, but she was swiftly pulled away from an almost bored looking Remus.

"That's enough." He stated quietly. Whenever Sirius and Dorcas had their spats, one of the others would have to intervene before it became a duel. It was like a roster now. She rolled her eyes and let Remus pull her away as the rest of the group made their way to their next class – transfiguration.

Sirius felt Lily walk up on the other side of him and whispered "I need to talk to you," before dragging a rather angry looking James to fall back behind them. How she'd managed to keep him quiet for this long baffled Sirius. If it were anybody else and he would have simply ignored their efforts and said whatever he wanted.

Sirius noticed Bethany Johnson walking towards them with a glint in her indigo eyes. She was twirling a strand of dark auburn hair and looking as if Christmas had come early. Opening her mouth, she began to say something Sirius was sure would have been both insulting and petty – but nobody heard what she had to say because with a lazy flick from his wand, she starting choking. Marlene raised her eyebrows questioningly at Sirius – silently asking him which spell he'd used – but in response he just smirked. The next thing they knew, a large and slimy slug was crawling out of the Hufflepuff's mouth. She screamed in shock but that didn't last long because slugs were now erupting from her mouth in an alarming rate.

Marlene snorted – her bad mood with Sirius evidently disappeared and she burst out laughing. He grinned and raised his voice as he turned to the various onlookers.

"Does anybody else have something they want to say?" He taunted and was pleased to see they had all cast their eyes away and hurriedly bustled away. Sirius turned around to look at James who was still unsmiling but his eyebrows were raised as he watched Johnson rush away to the hospital wing. He looked over at Sirius and by the slight twitching of James' mouth, Sirius could tell that he was trying very hard to look stern and keep himself from laughing. Sirius smiled sheepishly at him, and in the end his resolve failed and so smirked in return.

"I'm still pissed at you though," He stated, crossing his arms. "But I think watching you being confronted by Marley's brothers will entertain me enough to eventually forgive you." He laughed at the thought and Alice reprimanded him with a light punch. Sirius gulped nervously and glanced at Marlene, who had now gone pale.

"They're going to kill us," She whispered in fear. "And mother will surely disown me." She closed her eyes and bit down her bottom lip to stop it from shaking. Sirius looked up in panic at Lily and Alice – both of whom quickly took over and comforted Marlene. He simply just squeezed her hand.

Sirius left them to it as he and James – as though they had a frequency for Slytherins – looked up to find members of the house turn into the hallway. The two Marauders automatically pulled out their wands and assumed a protective stance – rather like lions intimidating predators away from their Pride.

The Slytherins – which happened to consist of three 7th years and a 5th year – spotted Marlene almost instantly and began sniggering loudly. Sirius growled quietly – revving himself for the fight that was bound to occur. He felt James change his position from defensive to offensive and the two could practically read each other's thought. Only an idiot would duel against _both_ James and Sirius. When they spotted Severus Snape lingering at the back of the group, they saw Lily also whip out her wand from the corner of their eyes.

"Don't even think of saying anything" She snarled venomously at the approaching Slytherins who were far enough that whatever they wanted to say had to be said loudly – which was probably the point. Marlene squirmed uncomfortably. The Slytherins laughed at Lily's efforts but otherwise ignored her completely. Snape however, eyed her wand warily.

"Is it true then Black? Have you actually knocked up McKinnon? Walburga will be _so_ proud, won't she Reg?" William Nott jeered. Regulus Black looked up, his face expressionless if not for his eyes giving away the slightest alarm. Sirius turned to his brother, waiting for his reply – he'd never considered what his family would think, and to be honest he didn't care for their opinion anyway. Regulus raised his lips in a crooked smirk and replied maliciously.

"Tell me Sirius, dear brother. How do you think that spawn of Satan your whore is harbouring will feel to be number one on mother's hit list? Although I suppose if I had blood traitor parents I'd want to snuff it too," Regulus laughed. He'd certainly attained a large degree of audacity after Sirius left Grimmauld Place. Sirius had never hated his brother as much as he did at this very moment. He glared furiously at his younger brother – who looked so much like himself that it was a little disconcerting. Sirius couldn't think of a curse that would make him pay. In those two short sentences Regulus had managed to get under Sirius' skin like a parasite. When he was a child, Regulus would idolise Sirius – the brothers were inseparable. And then when Sirius came home after his first year at Hogwarts, things weren't quite the same. Reg would more often than not listen to his parents, refuse to cause mischief and worst of all, comply with their parents views. Sometime during that summer, Sirius knew he'd lost his little brother to a group of psychotic supremacists.

Sirius blamed them for stealing his younger brother away, for turning him into one of them. All his hatred was building up, every ounce of disgust piled onto a need to _hurt._ There was only one spell that would do them justice. Sirius didn't even have to say it out loud. _Crucio_. The closest individual, who also happened to be their ringleader, was Samuel Travers. He crumpled to the ground and screamed out in terror, writhing in pain. Marlene gasped beside him, but Sirius didn't hear. His mind was clouded by such loathing that he wasn't aware of anything really, than his desire to burn.

And then, after barely a dozen seconds, Sirius was knocked to the ground by Alice Prewett. She must have used all the force she could muster, because her elfin stature was very weak in comparison to Sirius' 6-feet bulk. Sirius barked out a '_What the fuck!' _as he fell to the ground hard. He looked up to find Alice with a steely glower etched onto her porcelain pigmented face. She tucked a short strand of jet black hair behind her right ear before turning back to the fight that had been going on. James was duelling Snape with such ferocity that many students who had stopped to spectate were now edging back against walls. Lily and Marlene each had their own Slytherin to deal with and Alice was apparently on Sirius duty. Sirius harrumphed and got to his feet. Noticing that Travers was also looking less weak, Sirius promptly kicked him back into the ground. His foot made heavy contact with the Sytherin's mouth, and blood spilled out.

"Listen up Travers; if you dare touch a hair on Lena's head, I WILL FUCKING TORTURE YOUR BALLS OFF!" He yelled. Murder gleamed in the older Black's eye, as James successfully stunned Snape and limped forward. Lifting him up by his green and silver striped tie, Sirius pulled Travers up so his lips were an inch away from his ear. "And I'll make all of you pay for what you did to my brother. Don't you forget it." He whispered dangerously, before dropping him to the ground, resulting in a loud crack of bone breaking.

Nott and Macnair soon realised that they were unnumbered and didn't have any chances of winning the brawl. So after sharing a quick look while the girls were distracted ran away. Macnair however, managed to send a jinx towards Marlene, causing her to rise towards the ceiling.

Marlene felt around the walls – wondering if she had imagined herself becoming lighter – but when the ground didn't look so near anymore she began panicking. Nobody had noticed, as they were all trying to calm Sirius down from his rage. She latched onto bulges and pillars in the hallway. She'd never realised how high the ceilings in Hogwarts were. Her shoulder pained from a hex she had received from Macnair and simply lifting them up was hurting. Breathing heavily and letting out little gasps she struggled to keep herself from drifting away. Sometime in her whimpering, Marlene must have either risen high enough or made enough noise that somebody noticed her.

"Marley!" It was James' alarmed shout. His voice prompted her own and she called his name in help.

"James, I don't know what hex this is!"

"Lena?" It was apparent that Sirius had finally come off of his frenzy when he spotted Marlene. "Hold on tight, we're going to pull you down. CAN ONE OF YOU DUMB FUCKS CALL A GOD DAMN PROFESSOR?!" He roared. A fifth year Gryffindor, Mary Macdonald jumped up slightly and sprinted to Professor McGonagall's office. Lily was holding onto one of Marlene's arms, while James was holding onto the other. Sirius had wrapped his arms securely around her waist, but he could feel her pulling all three up too. How powerful was this spell?

Thankfully, Professor McGonagall came running into the corridor, closely followed by Professor Dumbledore himself. First and second years were wide eyed and terrified, while the older students mainly looked entertained.

"I can't hold on much longer Marls!" Lily yelped. Alice rushed to her aid, but Marlene cried out in pain. It was her left shoulder, Sirius realised.

"Let go Lily!" Sirius urgently commanded. James opened his mouth to protest, but Marlene silenced him with a shake of her head. Lily hesitantly let go, and Sirius held on tighter.

Professor McGonagall attended to James and Lily while Professor Dumbledore pointed his wand at Marlene's stomach. Sirius instinctively pulled her away as she clamped her hands over his. The Professor however, wasted no time in explanations and simply held Sirius in place with a strong grip before swirling his wand in complicated movements. Various colours of fog erupted from the Professor's wand, and before too long, Marlene relaxed in Sirius' arms. He sighed in relief, allowing the exhaustion take over his body. Both teenagers collapsed against the wall, wiping sweat from their faces.

Professor McGonagall, after fixing up James and Lily's injuries and giving them a week's detention turned to Marlene.

"Miss McKinnon, you need to go to the Hospital Wing immediately. You are about to collapse and I see that you are concussed. "

Marlene jerked her head up and shook it in fear. "No! I'm feeling fine … I'll just go to my dorm and sleep for a while."

"There is a high chance that you will fall into a coma if you do that! I must insist on this. I will not award any punishments to you as I understand you were only defending yourself." Sirius inwardly snorted. Here was pitier number one. How the Professor had found out so quickly baffled Sirius .

Marlene must have realised too, because she hung her head and after one last glance at Sirius, allowed Alice to walk her to the Hospital Wing. McGonagall levitated Travers with a lazy flick of her wand and followed the girls. Dumbledore quickly made work of dismissing the students to their next class – after all, most of the older students had already gone after Marlene was rescued. He then turned to Sirius with a most grave expression.

"Mr Black, I understand Miss McKinnon is with child. Am I correct in my inference?" Sirius nodded, now thoroughly confused. Couldn't they have discussed this at another time? Dumbledore however, continued. "The spell that Mr Macnair performed on her was designed for a foetus to suffocate. By raising his mother to extreme high altitudes, it would successfully kill them both. Luckily, Miss McKinnon was indoors and surrounded by people. He will be sufficiently punished. " Sirius paled considerably and felt his knees grow weak. He forced himself to zone back in though – he knew how easily his fear and sorrow turned to anger.

"Now that so many people have found out, she is in immense danger. Your major vulnerability is quite plain now, and you must be careful as should Miss McKinnon – especially Miss McKinnon – as they will use her and her unborn child to break you." The professor's expression suddenly turned stern and his eyes became fierce. "For your actions, I am deducting 200 points from Gryffindor. You will be banned from the upcoming Quidditch game as well as all Hogsmeade visits for the rest of your seventh year and every weekend, you are to serve detention with Professor Slughorn. The cruciatus curse is illegal Mr Black. There is enough evidence against you for a lifetime in Azkaban – but I will allow this to slide this once. Hold your ground Sirius – don't let anybody take away the honourable man you have always been."

Sirius sank to the floor as Professor Dumbledore left to his office. It had been barely half an hour since the secret was let out and he'd had a panic attack and already his unborn child and his girlfriend were nearly killed. He himself had broken one of the biggest laws and now according to Regulus, his family would soon plot to murder somebody who had barely begun life.

There was another two months of danger left to endure. What should have been the best time of their schooling had already become the worst. They were all in grave danger – Marlene the worst. She was right, if Sirius doesn't control his outbursts, they would be able to drive him into insanity so easily. He was going to go see his friends now – he would joke around, and not tell anybody what the curse was actually about to do. Their reactions would only be of revenge and the last thing Marlene needed was more stress.

Now walking with determination, Sirius took deep breaths, willing himself to be the better man. Going against his nature was becoming very common recently, but he found that he didn't mind so much anymore. Perhaps the great Sirius Black was beginning to finally grow up.

**A/N: Just thought I'd add a little trivia; Travers was said to be involved in the murder of the McKinnons :) x**


End file.
